AMRA
The big news in last weeks Alleghany News was on the sports page. Seems that the Alleghany Mower Racing Association (AMRA) kicked off the season with racing at the fairgrounds in Sparta. Over a hundred drivers participated in 20 heats and about 1500 fans showed up to cheer them.
Now, let me tell you, folks, that's serious stuff right there. Fully 2% of every male in the county, you understand, was racing a lawn mower last Saturday night and 15% of every man, woman and child was watching them.
Let me put that into a marketing perspective for you. Less than 7% of every man, woman and child watched the World Series last fall. And, they didn't even have to leave their homes or pay to watch America's Pastime at its best!
Were I NASCAR, I would be concerned. If a bunch of bootleggers from Wilkes County can put NASCAR on the map, why not a bunch of lawn-mowing NASCAR wannabees from next-door Alleghany County and the AMRA?
I can just hear the sportscaster on the Sparta public access channel now:
Now, let me tell you, folks, that's serious stuff right there. Fully 2% of every male in the county, you understand, was racing a lawn mower last Saturday night and 15% of every man, woman and child was watching them.
Let me put that into a marketing perspective for you. Less than 7% of every man, woman and child watched the World Series last fall. And, they didn't even have to leave their homes or pay to watch America's Pastime at its best!
Were I NASCAR, I would be concerned. If a bunch of bootleggers from Wilkes County can put NASCAR on the map, why not a bunch of lawn-mowing NASCAR wannabees from next-door Alleghany County and the AMRA?
I can just hear the sportscaster on the Sparta public access channel now:
- TV Guy: "That was quite a race you ran tonight, John Boy."
- John Boy: " Well, there weren't nothin' to it really 'cause the boys down at City Body Auto had that CarQuest/Farmer's Hardware/Mountain Dreams Realty John Deere X700 running real strong tonight."
- TV Guy: "I was a little surprised because you didn't look all that fast in the warm-ups."
- John Boy: "I reckon that was my fault."
- TV Guy: "How so?"
- John Boy: "Well, I mowed Mrs. Joines lawn this afternoon and I forgot to put the blades out of gear. It kinda messed up the aerodynamics 'til I noticed them puppies was still aspinnin'."
- TV Guy: "You keep running like you did tonight, John Boy, and I sure you'll be mowing down the competition for the entire racing season."
- John Boy: "Well I sure appreciate that, Bubba. Say, you wouldn't happen to have a beer on you, would ya?"
Can't you just see it now? The champion puts on a tuxedo and flies up to New York City to receive the AMRA (by now renamed the American Mower Racing Association) "Mower of the Year" award.
Or, at least pulls on a clean pair of jeans before driving over to The Pines (on the lawnmower of course) for some of that oh! so gooooood country-style steak before the trophy ceremony gets underway in the back room.
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