A Christmas Note
My Dear Children,
It's only 7 days until Christmas and your Mother and I look forward to your arrival here on the mountain this weekend. I've been busy cleaning the house and you will find it to be, by househusbandry standards, spotless upon your arrival. The wreaths will be hung and the tree will be fully decorated. However, wishing to make this a wonderful holiday, I think it's best that I tell you in advance of a few changes this year.
First of all, it's important that you understand THERE IS NO SANTA CLAUS. Yes, I know, we fed you that cock and bull story when you were young and we should have told you that it wasn't so a loooong time ago. Sad to say, no one comes down the chimney with lots of goodies.
What does that mean?
I cleaned the refrigerator and it is nearly EMPTY. The same can be said for the pantry. BRING FOOD. Each of you (even if you just happen to be a chef) are responsible for one complete meal.
Second, I am RETIRED.
And, that?
It means that I don't always get up early in the morning and I am prone to taking naps in the afternoon. It also means that you may hear me asking "When will breakfast be ready?" from time to time. I will make the martinis, biscuits and white gravy but nothing else is a slam dunk. I will also babysit Spud one evening in order that Wawa and Ed can get an out-of-house break. (Note to CFO: I may need a little help if you-know-what happens while they are gone.)
So, bring it on!
Love,
Your "Retired" Dad :-)>
PS: Consider your Mom retired, too!
PPS: She's the one who told me there's no Santa.
It's only 7 days until Christmas and your Mother and I look forward to your arrival here on the mountain this weekend. I've been busy cleaning the house and you will find it to be, by househusbandry standards, spotless upon your arrival. The wreaths will be hung and the tree will be fully decorated. However, wishing to make this a wonderful holiday, I think it's best that I tell you in advance of a few changes this year.
First of all, it's important that you understand THERE IS NO SANTA CLAUS. Yes, I know, we fed you that cock and bull story when you were young and we should have told you that it wasn't so a loooong time ago. Sad to say, no one comes down the chimney with lots of goodies.
What does that mean?
I cleaned the refrigerator and it is nearly EMPTY. The same can be said for the pantry. BRING FOOD. Each of you (even if you just happen to be a chef) are responsible for one complete meal.
Second, I am RETIRED.
And, that?
It means that I don't always get up early in the morning and I am prone to taking naps in the afternoon. It also means that you may hear me asking "When will breakfast be ready?" from time to time. I will make the martinis, biscuits and white gravy but nothing else is a slam dunk. I will also babysit Spud one evening in order that Wawa and Ed can get an out-of-house break. (Note to CFO: I may need a little help if you-know-what happens while they are gone.)
So, bring it on!
Love,
Your "Retired" Dad :-)>
PS: Consider your Mom retired, too!
PPS: She's the one who told me there's no Santa.
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