Mater Samitch

Ah, a July mater samitch, the perfect summer lunch!


Ingredients:

2 slices of Bunny white bread (not whole grain and without anything the least bit healthy)

1 Johnston County vine ripened tomato with a diameter the same size as the width of the bread

Duke's mayonnaise (not the low fat kind and not Hellman's)

salt

pepper

Preparation:

Slather both pieces of bread with mayonnaise until 1/8-inch thick.

Slice tomato at least 3/8-inch thick.

Place tomato slice on one piece of bread.

Salt and pepper to taste.

Place second piece of bread on tomato slice.

Slice diagonally into two parts.

Eating:

Bite daintily to avoid mushing the bread.

Roll around the mouth as you would a fine wine, inhaling a little air between the teeth.

Swallow when bread has lost texture.