The Bride Price

I've been doing a little studying on this "bride price" thing and it's all very interesting.

Seems it all got started thousands of years ago when humans were primarily agrarian tribes. The "bride price" was paid by the groom to the family of the bride as compensation for the loss of her labor and fertility within her kin group.

"Well, now, she's a mighty good producers and we gotta get three goats and a milk cow for her."

I am a mushroom farmer and garden grower, you understand.

The bride price was a feature in the Code of Hammarabi written about 1760 BCE:

If any one, who has brought chattels into his father-in-law's house, and has paid the purchase-money, looks for another wife, and says to his father-in-law: "I do not want your daughter," the girl's father may keep all that he had brought. (Forfeiture of earnest money.)

If a man bring chattels into the house of his father-in-law, and pay the "purchase price" (for his wife): if then the father of the girl say: "I will not give you my daughter," he shall give him back all that he brought with him. (Deal or no deal.)

If a man bring chattels into his father-in-law's house and pay the "purchase price," if then his friend slander him, and his father-in-law say to the young husband: "You shall not marry my daughter," the he shall give back to him undiminished all that he had brought with him; but his wife shall not be married to the friend. (Who brings reason that this man and this woman shall not be wed? Speak now or forever hold your peace.)

If a man marry a woman and she bear him no sons; if then this woman die, if the "purchase price" which he had paid into the house of his father-in-law is repaid to him, her husband shall have no claim upon the dowry of this woman; it belongs to her father's house. (Listen up, Thriller. The dowry is chattel given by the groom to the bride in the event of his demise. This is a different thing than the bride price given to the bride's family by the groom.)

Okay, we are now on sound legal footing! But just what is a reasonable and customary "bride price" these days? We do have, however, the "bride price" legal code for Eastern Nigeria as a starting point.

First Visit - A suitor shall make the customary first visit to his prospective in-law accompanied by not more than four relatives and/or friends with not more than one gallon of palm wine.

Second Visit - On the second customary visit the suitor accompanied by not more than five persons shall present to his proposed in-law not more than two gallons of palm wine (Nkwu Enu), four gallions of raffia palm wine (Ngwo), one carton of beer, one crate of soft drinks and one bottle of gin.

Third Visit - On the customary third visit, the suitor shall be accompanied by nine persons and he shall on this occasion present to the family of the prospective bribe not more than two gallons of palm wine (Nkwu Enu), four gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo), two cartons of beer, two crates of soft drinks and one bottle of choice spirit or hot drink.

Bride Price (traditionally known as Ime ego nwanyi) - Bride price shall be in strict conformity with the provisions of Limitation of Dowry Law, Cap. 76, Laws of Eastern Nigeria, 1963, so however that the maximum bride price payable shall not exceed the sum of sixty naira.

Ima Ogodo - Not more than ten persons shall accompany the suitor on this occasion during which he shall present to the bride's family not more than the following items:

One native goat (Ewu Igbo)

Ten big yams

Ten big coco yams

One bunch of plaintains

One bunch of bananas

Two gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo)

Eight Kola nuts and

One bottle of spirit (hot drink)

To the youths (Umu Okolobia) of the bride's family, kindred or village the suitor shall present on this occasion:

Two gallons of palm wine (Nkwu Enu) and

Four gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo)

To the maidens (Umu Agboghobia) of the bride's family, kindred or village the suitor shall present on this occasion:

Two gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo) and

Two crates of soft drinks

To the bride's mother the suitor shall on this occasion present:

Four gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo)

Two gallons of palm wine (Nkwu Enu) and

Two crates of soft drinks

To the married female members (Umu Okpu) of the bride's family, kindred or village the suitor shall on this occasion present:

Two gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo)

One gallons of palm wine (Nkwu Enu)

One crate of soft drinks

The sum of five naira

On this occasion all phonographic records, tapes, gifts of money and/or cartons of beer or other alcholic beverages, except as hereinabove provided, are prohibited.

Bachelor's Eve Celebrations

All forms of bachelor's eve and/or bride's send-off celebrations are hereby prohibited.

Idu Uno - The bride's father may present to the bride the usual tradition and/or customary gifts.

The bride's father is prohibited from giving to the bride gifts of motor car, motorcycle, refrigerator, radio receiving set, television, real property (i.e. land or building), bed or cookers.

Ikpolu Uno - Not more than ten persons shall accompany the bride's family to the suitor's home.

On this occasion the suitor's family shall present the bride's family with:

One native goat (Ewu Igbo)

Food and entertainment

A sum not exceeding twenty naira to the bride's father and

A sum not exceeding ten naira to the bride's mother

Amalum Uzo Ogo - Only three persons, viz, the bride's father, mother and the middleman (witness to the customary marriage) shall visit the suitor's home for the purpose of this customary occasion.

Igbu Ewu Nwa (presentation of Children to their Maternal Family) - This incident of customary marriage shall be retained but only twenty persons from the husband's family are allowed to attend.

Items of customary presents to the wife's family during this ceremony are limited and restricted to:

One native goat (Ewu Igbo) for a male child

One hen for a female child

Two gallons of palm wine (Nkwu-Enu)

Eight gallons of raffia palm wine (Ngwo)

Eight Kola nuts

Four cartons of beer

Four crates of soft drinks

One bottle of spirit (hot-drink) and

One bowl of food

Oh, boy. Looks like this "bride's price" thing is fairly involved and requires a really good liver!

And I don't even know if I like palm wine.

So, Breeze, want to work out a cash settlement?

I've already got a couple of goats, you know, and they are might hard to come by there in Apex.